I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
