she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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