can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize