haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
we're so committed to being not committed
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
