I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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