i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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