Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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