I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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