a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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