you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
