thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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