I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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