I'm drive I can fine osifer
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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