can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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