Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
