I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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