College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize