I didn't shave. On purpose
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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