i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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