I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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