I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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