Sry I called you an 8
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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