before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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