Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
