Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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