chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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