alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize