Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
