And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
