People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
