At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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