Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
