Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
