Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
