I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
