so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Randomize
