he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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