Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
