they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
