what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
