I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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