Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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