Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Let's get the cat blown out
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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