She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Randomize
