Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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