she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
