Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
