4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize