I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
