Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
